“Everyone has a ‘risk muscle.’ You keep it in shape by trying new things. If you don’t, it atrophies. Make a point of using it at least once a day.” – Roger Von Oech

Monday, September 12, 2016

I thought about it while I hiked and decided, it’s time I go last. It made me nervous thinking about it. I should try this new thing, though. I don’t need a hand to hold! I’m a big girl and I know what I’m doing! I announced I wanted to go last as we were gearing up, and someone jokingly said, “It’s so lonely!” Then my friend Rima, sings, “Lonely, I’m so lonely,” then I chime to to help finish, “I have nobody, to call my own!”

It’s a unique feeling being the last jumper on the mountain. I just watched my friends and husband jump off. Nobody is waiting for me to go. Nobody else is there watching. No cameras. No pressure. It’s just my energy, my thoughts, my feelings on the mountain. I know I can do this. I can do whatever I want, however I want, whenever I want! I took my time using the ropes to get down to the lowest point where I like to exit from. I did a final check of my leg straps, chest strap, helmet clasp, zippers, and pilot chute handle. It’s all perfect. Deep breath. I sing out loud, “Lonely, I’m so lonely!” Ha! I’m really not lonely, I just thought it would be funny to sing that by myself. I am goofy, even by myself. 3, 2, wait. I don’t even need to count down! Why do I count down? Do I do that for me to give me a go time, or do I do that for someone else to let them know I’m going? I giggle out loud at the random question that pops into my head. Then I giggle more because I’m giggling by myself while standing on the edge of a 3,000 foot cliff, about to jump off. Then I think about that old saying all parents, including my own, have said, “If all your friends jumped off a cliff would you do it to?” Well, yes. Yes, I would. I giggle some more. I look out at the beautiful Italian scene – vineyards, mountains, lakes, rivers, and orchards. I breath in consciously, and out consciously. Go. I jump, I track, I open and I giggle some more. I did it. I land next to Dustin. I tried something new today. I exercised my risk muscle. I feel empowered.